


A Snowball's Chance

by Nihilistic_Janitor



Category: Naruto, Pocket Monsters: Black & White | Pokemon Black and White Versions
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Cultural Differences, Female Protagonist, Fish out of Water, Gen, Reincarnation, Video Game Mechanics
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-12
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:34:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24677008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nihilistic_Janitor/pseuds/Nihilistic_Janitor
Summary: In which a Vanillite finds herself reincarnated in a rainy. war-torn ninja nation and wonders if she'll be able to find a better trainer this time around. At least this time she has an Egg Move and a Hidden Ability, right? She'll be fine.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 37
Collections: Reincarnation and Transmigration





	A Snowball's Chance

**Author's Note:**

> Just warning you up front, this fic does have some other AU changes to the Naruto universe. Namely, Madara is dead for realsies, Zetsu isn't around, and Nagato hasn't got the Rinnegan. None of that was what this story was ever gonna be about, so snip snip away it goes.

“When the morning sun hit an icicle, it wished not to melt, and thus Vanillite was born.”

— Pokemon Ultra Moon Pokedex entry for Vanillite

* * *

“Go, Soft Serve!”

Vanillite blinked once as the safe, comfortable, temperature-controlled confines of her Poke ball vanished. Her trainer was in a castle, cradling a Poke ball that wasn’t hers, and looking down on her with hard eyes.

On the other side of the battlefield was a human with green hair, and a dragon. A very large, white dragon, radiating so much heat that Vanillite could feel her snow turning to slush.

Vanillite turned to look at her trainer. This wasn’t— she wasn’t ready for this! He hadn’t trained her, had barely taken her out of the box once since he’d found her hiding in the Cold Storage. Even then, only after everyone else in there had been withdrawn first. This was— 

“Soft Serve, I just need you to take one hit. Just to stall while I patch up Apollo.”

Vanillite stared blankly at her trainer.

“Your sacrifice won’t be in vain.”

The dragon grumbled impatiently. The man with green hair shook his head. Vanillite took a hesitant step forward.

This wasn’t what it was supposed to be like. Other Pokemon, they were happy with their trainers. They were loved, cherished, taken care of. She’d seen it with her own eyes, the way the Cold Storage workers treated their Pokemon, the way the occasional gym challenger came through to train in the cold. Having a trainer was supposed to make you happy.

She bit her lip. Humans weren’t like that. Her trainer wouldn’t do that. He must have a plan, he must. That was one thing she’d heard for certain from the rare Pokemon that was returned to the box. He always had a plan.

(No one ever told her why fewer and fewer Pokemon came back as time went on. They said she was too young to know.)

The man with green hair said something she didn’t hear. The dragon reared its head. Somewhere behind her, her trainer rooted through his bag. In between the dragon’s jaws, a miniature sun formed.

All she had to do was take this one hit. Her trainer would be endlessly thankful. She would be a hero. She was worrying for no reason. Everything would be okay. She wasn’t going to melt. She was stronger than that.

The dragon lunged. The sun roared towards her. And as the Fusion Flare vaporized Vanillite, all she could think was that she wished she had one more chance. 

* * *

There was something nice about not having a name again.

It always felt weird, having one. Names weren’t something Pokemon gave themselves, after all. They were something that belonged to humans. Species names, nicknames, move names, it was all so human.

She wasn’t the same as she was before. Her arms were long, and ended in fingers, and had blood inside them. She didn’t have that nice, comfortable coating of snow around her. She had hair now. Hair was weird. Blood was weird.

She was still a Pokemon, though. Even though everyone around her seemed convinced that she wasn’t. She knew she was a Pokemon, and that was plenty.

“We have to do something, Nagato! Look at her!”

Hair and blood together were especially weird. The blood made her hair stick straight to her forehead, and felt so uncomfortably hot against her skin, and turned her pretty snowy hair the ugliest shade of red she’d ever seen. And it was so wet. She didn’t like wet before, where it turned beautiful happy snow into ugly slush, and she didn’t like wet now that everything around her was all wet and metal and no snow at all.

“I know, but...”

It was weird how humans reacted to her now, too. It seemed completely random. Sometimes she would go up to a person and they’d use an attack on her, even if all she did was point hopefully at their food. Usually, before, they would at least toss her scraps. At least these three seemed to like her okay, even if none of them wanted to actually be her trainer.

“Are you sure it’s a good idea? It was a shinobi who did this to her.”

They seemed really worried about her. It was only one attack. She’d fainted from it, sure, but she’d be fine with a little rest. It was natural for kicks to really hurt ice Pokemon. She was even conscious again, though she didn’t really want to open her eyes just yet.

“This one is different, Konan! I’ll go prove it.”

She heard Yahiko walk away from them. This whole conversation they were having was all human stuff. She didn’t get it, but then, she didn’t really have to. Just like she didn’t have to speak like humans did and she didn’t have to worry about the cold like humans did. Like how humans didn’t need a trainer, but she did. Regular differences.

“Is he going to be okay?”

“Of course he is. He’s our leader!”

A stretch of silence passed. She thought about that berry. So much like a Chesto berry that she couldn’t keep herself from trying to grab it from the stall, even with a shinobi standing right there. A taste of home, and not just that, her favorite food from home? She had to at least try. Maybe she’d be able to go back there once she found some money. Money didn’t make a lot of sense to her, but that was alright. She could figure it out enough to get a Chesto berry, at least.

“Nagato, Konan, come on! Get her over here!”

She was hoisted up, as gently as the other two could manage. She could feel the rain on her face. Nagato grunted, and shifted her arm around a little. Yahiko was saying something to the shinobi he found.

“...bleeding, and we don’t know...”

Nagato and Konan placed her on the road. A woman she didn’t recognize the voice of spoke.

“...not serious...”

She knew that already.

“...already fed...”

She didn’t really feel like paying attention. These weren’t Nagato and Yahiko and Konan. These were just other humans she didn’t know.

“...teach us...please?”

That got her attention. She tried to open her eyes, shutting everything else out. She hadn’t really known what to make of shinobi, but hearing this made her wonder. Were shinobi like trainers? Could she find a trainer so easily? One who would really teach her, really care for her, really show her how to fight?

There was more talking going on, but she didn’t care. She had to wake herself up. If she could fight, she could impress a trainer. A trainer who would be everything she’d always hoped she’d find.

It took forever, but Vanillite opened her eyes. A man with white hair and a shinobi headband was kneeling in front of her. She didn’t see any other shinobi around.

“What’s your name?” he asked her.

Yahiko and Nagato looked at each other. Konan said, “She doesn’t talk.”

The man smiled lightly at her. “It’s alright if you can’t say. I’m Jiraiya. It’s nice to meet you.”

“I don’t have a name,” she said. Her voice felt weirdly scratchy.

It was a genuine surprise to her when it seemed like everyone had understood what she said. It was more of a surprise how they reacted— giving her pitying looks. 

“I don’t need a name until I have a trainer,” she clarified. It really wasn’t an issue. She didn’t want them to feel bad for her, names were a human thing.

Jiraiya’s smile faltered a little, but then he said, “Well, I’ll need to call you something, right? How does Reika sound?”

Reika’s eyes sparkled. “You want to be my trainer?”

Jiraiya’s smile edged into pained territory, but he just said, “We’ll see, kid,” and stood. “Now come on, everyone. I saw a place where we can stay for the time being.”

Reika beamed, skipping along after everyone else as they began to walk through the rain. Jiraiya seemed like a super nice trainer! She was going to be the best Pokemon she could be. She was going to be super tough, and a good battler, and learn all the best moves, and really impress him.

A thought occurred to Reika. “You’re going to give me a chance, right? You’re not just going to put me in the box?”

Jiraiya stumbled.

* * *

They had a home. 

Reika couldn’t help but run her hands over every surface in the little hut the first time she saw it, marvelling at the fact that it was theirs. Jiraiya had found or bought or scavenged furniture, and there were mats, and there was a kitchen, and Reika thought it was amazing.

Jiraiya was really, really kind! He insisted on her living with everyone else, and treating her like a human, and he didn’t even put her in a ball to sleep. She slept like she did when she was freshly new in the Cold Storage. Lying under a blanket, together with everyone, just listening to the rain and the sounds of breathing. The blanket wasn’t snow, sure, and she had fingers, and she had a name, but still. It was nice.

Less nice was the food they were going to be eating. It hadn’t been a problem so far. Crackers and stuff had been fine, and planty things, and fruits, but now Jiraiya was teaching them to catch fish.

It wasn’t as though Reika didn’t know that humans would eat certain water-type Pokemon, and she’d seen plenty of flying-types snatch up Basculin, but it wasn’t something that she ate! She wasn’t that kind of Pokemon. She ate snow, and water, and berries, and never other Pokemon.

And yes, the Pokemon they fished up didn’t seem all there. They didn’t say anything, they just flopped around on the bank until they ran out of breath. They weren’t— it wasn’t like when she heard a Basculin cursing and spitting threats and promising death on a Tranquill carrying it off— but it still made her uncomfortable.

She stared at the glazed, vacant eye of a water-type Jiraiya had fished up. A small, worried voice whispered that maybe she hadn’t seen as many Pokemon around because these humans ate _all_ Pokemon, and soon enough, they’d eat her too.

But that voice was a stupid voice. Jiraiya was her trainer. He wouldn’t do that to her. 

“Alright, kids! I think it’s time for you to give it a try.”

The other three took up their fishing rods, Yahiko in particular grinning as he did so, but Reika didn’t touch hers. She didn’t want to. 

“Now, just copy what I do, alright? One, two, three, cast!”

Jiraiya looked to make sure they’d done it right, and Reika could feel his eyes stop on her when he noticed she hadn’t picked up her fishing rod.

“Reika?”

She had to do what her trainer said. It was— it was part of being his Pokemon. She had to.

Reika smiled at him and grabbed the fishing rod.

She caught a fish on her first try. Yahiko made a face at her. Jiraiya ruffled her hair. It didn’t make her feel any better about the fish that she was going to have to _eat_ later, but it did make her feel like maybe she could do it anyway.

Days began to slip past Reika. She choked down fish, promising herself that it was worth it to make sure Jiraiya liked her. Konan helped her brush her hair. Yahiko and Nagato started arguing about little things. Nagato not bringing back the right herbs and mushrooms, Yahiko running off and not listening to Jiraiya, both of them thinking the other said something mean. Konan tended to break up their little arguments easily. Reika was mostly quiet, but that was alright. She was doing her best, and soon enough Jiraiya would have to start training her properly.

Maybe she was getting a little impatient, though.

It wasn’t as though they were learning nothing. Jiraiya would show them basic fighting moves, the sorts of things that weren’t really attacks but were an important thing to get used to, especially now that Reika had this new body of hers. How to dodge, how to throw things, how to do normal, regular punches. Foundational stuff, stuff she’d learned from Vanillish, before her trainer had caught her.

Nothing about it was new, though. And Reika couldn’t help but want to learn moves, to feel like she was really getting stronger. Maybe even to evolve, this time around.

Konan caught her daydreaming about it once, sitting outside by the lake. Jiraiya had finished teaching them for the day, but Yahiko had dragged a reluctant Nagato to spar with him in the mud for a bit to try out what Jiraiya had shown them. Konan had mostly been trying to make sure they didn’t tear each others’ hair out or something, and Reika had decided to dip her feet into the lake water and squelch mud between her new, weird toes and think about evolution.

The idea appealed to her a lot. She could imagine it so clearly; herself, a fully evolved Vanilluxe, standing by Jiraiya’s side as he took on the League championship. Or whatever it was people did here, Jiraiya didn’t seem like he really wanted to tell her.

But it didn’t matter what Jiraiya would need her for, what mattered was that she would be there with him! And she would be so, so strong. Strong like nobody in the Cold Storage had been. She would spit Blizzards with wild abandon, she’d have Acid Armor that could never be broken, she would be the kind of Pokemon that everyone dreamed about having with them!

She was waving her arms a little excitedly and making woosh noises, pretending that she knew Blizzard already, when Konan sat down next to her. “What are you doing, Reika?”

Reika felt her face heat up and shoved her hands into her lap. Then she brought one of her hands back up to make sure her face wasn’t melting, because if her face started melting from embarrassment that would be even more embarrassing. “Nothing.”

Konan gave her a smile, then stretched her arms. “Well, nothing definitely seems more fun than dealing with the boys right now. No, really, what were you up to?”

“Just thinking about something.” Reika’s voice was quiet.

“About what? You don’t have a crush, do you?”

“Wha--no!” Now Reika was sure her face was melting. “I don’t have a crush on them! Either of them! They’re _people_.”

Konan gave her that weird, soft look she used so often on her. “You’re a person too, Reika. It’s okay to have a crush. We can talk about it, if you want.”

Reika shook her head vigorously, nearly hitting Konan in the face with her hair. “No! No way. I wasn’t thinking about them at all! I was thinking about evolving.”

“Evolving?”

“Yeah! I want to get stronger, so I have to evolve. Then I’ll be able to really help out Jiraiya. We’ll be able to take on anything together!”

Konan’s face took a turn for the sadder. “Reika, Jiraiya isn’t going to stay here forever.” 

“But if I get strong enough, maybe he’ll take me with him! And then we’ll be able to train for a really long time.” Reika kicked her feet in the water a little, making small waves.

“Reika...” Konan bit her lip. “The three of us can keep you safe too, you know?”

“Yeah, but he’s my trainer. You have to stay with your trainer, unless he...” Reika looked back down at the water in front of her. “Unless he releases you, I guess. But that isn’t going to happen! Jiraiya is a nice trainer.”

Konan gives her a hug, and then Yahiko throws Nagato into the lake in front of them and everyone is covered in lakewater and mud and the conversation is over. Reika doesn’t think about it anymore. Jiraiya wouldn’t just release her. He doesn’t seem like the type to just throw his Pokemon away.

A few weeks after Jiraiya had found them a home, though, something happened. Konan was showing Reika how to fold origami. Jiraiya was out doing Jiraiya things, which were apparently a distinct subset of human things which the four of them weren’t allowed to join, and Yahiko and Nagato were out fishing. 

“Now you fold it together, like this.”

Reika nodded.

“Then take it and squash down each corner, like— no, like this, okay? Watch me. Squash and crease. See? No, no, here, let me show you...”

Reika sheepishly handed the paper over to Konan.

The sounds of arguing outside made Reika turn to watch the door. Yahiko’s voice was one she’d recognize anywhere.

“...telling you, you coulda caught that one! I told you how to do the trick!”

She didn’t catch Nagato’s quiet response, but she did hear an, “I did not!” from Yahiko as he threw open the door.

Konan looked up from the origami. “Did you catch a good dinner?”

Yahiko sourly presented a fish the size of a Tynamo. “Nope! Someone here couldn’t remember how to fish right, and let the big one get away.”

Nagato scuffed his foot against the floor. “It wasn’t my fault.”

“It was too your fault!” Yahiko yelled, and Reika could see Konan pushing herself to her feet with a weary expression, ready to mediate.

They had only caught one tiny fish for dinner? Reika didn’t like fish herself, but she knew just how much the other three liked fish when compared to the roots and berries and crackers they ate when they couldn’t catch anything. And Reika was the best fisher of the group, for some reason. And she did want to impress Jiraiya enough that he’d really train her.

So, while Yahiko and Nagato argued, and Konan tried to get them to stop, Reika quietly put her shoes on, picked up a fishing rod, and slipped out of the hut to find her favorite fishing spot.

There was a lake right by their little home, but Reika didn’t like it much. It felt uncomfortable, fishing so close to where she slept. She couldn’t help but imagine a swarm of vengeful Jellicent coming to drag her down into the depths during the night if she fished there too often. Not that she’d seen any Jellicent, but they were ghosts. She wouldn’t see them until it was too late.

So she went a little further on down the muddy footpath, enjoying the squish between her toes. The rain was a little warm on her skin, but it was better than rain used to be. She didn’t have to worry about her skin turning to sludge and sliding off her body anymore, after all.

Somewhere off to her right, she heard a splash. She turned to look, wondering if maybe it was a Pokemon, and maybe this one would be willing to speak to her, but the damp field in front of her seemed thoroughly empty. She took a couple curious steps towards the tall grass and reeds near where the splash came from— maybe it was a Mincinno! She hadn’t talked to a Mincinno in what felt like forever. 

Excited, she pushed the grass apart to see if there was anyone there. The grass was empty. She sighed, decided it must have been the wind or something, and continued on.

The lake she wanted was a bit muddier and a bit bigger than the one by their home, but it was also a lot prettier. There were a couple trees on the far bank, and little bug-types buzzed about the surface, and Reika could sometimes almost picture a Vanillish coming up behind her and scolding her for wandering away.

She cast her line.

Soon enough she had a good selection of decently-sized fish lying on the shore, having been neatly knocked out one-by-one as she fished them up by hitting them with timely Astonish attacks. She thought it odd the attack was so effective, but if they couldn’t speak, she could hardly expect them to battle well.

There were no more odd splashes beyond the ones the fish were making as she pulled them from the water.

Finally, she’d caught a big enough pile that it would hopefully satisfy everyone. She started to bundle them up in her arms, only to drop them with a start when a heavy hand landed on her shoulder.

“I wondered where you’ve been lately, brat.”

The voice made her still. That sounded a lot like the voice of the man who kicked her on the day she’d met her trainer. And a few days before that. And who’d knocked her to the ground a little before that with a punch. And... well, it wasn’t terribly important to dwell on.

She was almost certain he was a fighting type. His punches hurt.

Reika felt herself spun around roughly. Sure enough, it was him. Burn scar running down the side of his face, smirk, very large fists, and all. Reika gulped. His smirk only grew more.

“Not only do I find you where you don’t belong, but you’re practicing jutsu and stealing fish that aren’t yours. Lucky it was me who found you, brat. Some of my friends might have just snapped your neck and let the fish eat their fill.”

Hopefully she wouldn’t go down in one hit this time. She had a trainer now! Even if he hadn’t shown her anything about battling yet, just having a trainer was supposed to help. She wished he was here, though. She didn’t know what moves she was going to use to get out of this. Or if anyone would come get her if she fainted here.

“You should thank your lucky stars that Ame could always use more fodder.”

He raised a fist. Reika braced herself.

“In fact, I think I’ll start your training now.”

His punch sent her splashing down into the lake.

Reika sputtered as she dragged herself to her feet, the feeling of having her new body attacked very different and no more pleasant than before. It throbbed in a way ice didn’t, constantly reminding her of the damage she’d taken.

But she was conscious, and that was more than enough proof that just having a trainer was helping.

The man was closing on her to try and get another hit in, running on top of the water towards her. The lake water lapped at her knees. A move bubbled to the forefront of her mind as she took stock of herself. She’d gotten hit hard, sure, one more would probably cause her to faint. But she could also feel her skin beginning to crack in an odd way on her head, turning into ice crystals and flaking off.

Weak Armor. Skin felt odd and confining on her, and the hit to her was breaking some of that away, leaving her lighter and freer to move. Getting hit again would hurt her even worse, but she just had to not get hit again.

A move bubbled to the forefront of her mind. One of the moves that she’d woken in this new body with, in fact. One that was new to her, but that she knew exactly how to use.

“Egg Move: Autotomize!” She yelled it out, as though the words were as ingrained into her mind as the move itself was. In a heartbeat, she’d separated from herself— all the soldier made contact with was the simulacrum of snow and ice in her body’s shape that contained her weight. She had leapt high into the air, light as a feather, and faster than she ever had been before.

Her next instinct was simple. She had one real attack. She would use it.

The soldier’s moment of shock at the slushy mass lying in the lake where she’d been was all the time she needed. By the time he’d turned around and spotted her, she’d already made contact with the bank and kicked off, flying towards him.

“Level One: Astonish!”

It wasn’t exactly powerful, or clever, or interesting, as attacks went. It was, in fact, little more than slamming into him full-tilt while shouting. But, as luck would have it, her unexpected speed and anger were enough to make him flinch backwards a half-step into the water as she slammed into him.

It barely hurt him, though. She wasn’t built for this kind of attack, leaving alone the fact that she barely weighed anything at the moment. 

So she kicked off his face, landed back on the edge of the bank, scooped up a fish, and turned to run. He was just too strong for her to fight. Not fainting was enough of a victory anyway. But she hadn’t gotten more than a few steps away before she spotted her trainer standing in the muddy field, staring at her in shock.

Reika ran to her trainer. Her trainer put a hand on her head, and gazed down at her with a thoughtful look. She smiled. “I can keep battling if you want me to!”

He looked at the soldier, who had started to pursue her, some kind of knife in his hand and anger written all over his face. Her trainer glared. The soldier took in her trainer’s appearance, glared back at him and Reika, and vanished from sight.

“Come on, kid. Let’s go get those fish you caught and get home.”

The smile slid off her face at the same time she felt the feeling of battle drain away from her. She settled a little more heavily into the mud, her speed vanishing from her limbs, her defenses rising back into place. Her trainer wasn’t even looking at her, he just headed towards the lake and the fish lying there on the shore.

Disappointment bloomed in Reika’s chest. She hadn’t been good enough. Her trainer had been watching for that whole fight, probably, and he hadn’t thought she was good enough to use. She could already feel the endless boredom of sitting in the Box and twiddling her brand-new thumbs, useless and pointless and worthless.

Reika picked up a fish. It stared at her. She stared back.

Her trainer didn’t say anything to her as they walked back towards the house. He just gazed off into the distance, not seeing her or taking any notice of her. It was a familiar feeling from before, and one that made her shrink into herself and hug the fish to her chest. Then she realized she was smearing mud and fish-smell all over herself, and stopped. Good Pokemon had to look ready to fight. Purrloin had been adamant about that, before.

She hoped Purrloin was okay. She’d almost made the Box tolerable, at least until she was withdrawn. After that, Reika hadn’t seen her again.

Her trainer held the door open for her. Yahiko and Nagato were sitting on opposite sides of the room, not looking at each other. Konan, however, saw Reika come in and let out a little gasp when she saw Reika’s face.

Reika brought up a hand to her face. It came away red. Blood. Huh.

“Reika! What happened? Are you okay?” Konan was already rushing up to her, snagging a cloth on the way, moving to dab the blood off Reika’s face.

“It was just a little battle. I’m fine. I didn’t even faint.”

That didn’t seem to reassure anyone. Yahiko and Nagato were staring at her wide-eyed, their own fight forgotten. Jiraiya dropped the fish on the table, sighed, and seemed to come to a decision.

“I’ve decided to teach you all Ninjutsu.”

Konan stopped dabbing at her face. Yahiko and Nagato gaped at her trainer. Reika cocked her head to the side.

“Ninjustu?” she asked.

**Author's Note:**

> This is one of those weird story ideas that bounced around in my noggin for a while and I decided to actually get cracking on. Besides, my gal Vanillite is adorable and deserves more love, and if I have to write about her becoming a ninja to get y'all on board with the ice cream scoop im dishing out then that's what I'll do dang it. Also because it makes me sob like a waterfall that the Ame Orphans turned into weird cultists when all they wanted was to eat the rich. So I'm KOing two Pidoves with one Rock Throw.


End file.
